Loose skin: A frank discussion....

Let's tackle the elephant in the room. This isn't an easy issue to talk about, but it's there and it's real:

So with large amounts of weight loss comes loose skin. Think of it this way:
If you put a brick in a garbage bag for 5 minutes and suspend the bag so the bag is hanging, the brick will cause the bag to sag. Take the brick out and the bag will mostly go back to its original shape and not be saggy.
Take that same bag and same brick and leave it in there for a long period of time then take the brick out, the bag will remain saggy.
The same is true with skin. You lift weights when losing weight to help alleviate that, but there will always be loose skin.

I have loose skin. I do. My arms don't have loose hanging skin because I lift a lot of weights. The same is true with my chest. I don't have droopy man-boobs because I've been lifting.
However, even due to countless crunches and back extension exercises, my stomach and my back have loose skin. I put a lot of weight on around the midsection, so it got loose when I lost the weight. The only thing you can do about that is have surgery.
One of the guys that works out at Mercy Wellness Center had gastric bypass and lost a ton of weight. He doesn't do much lifting. He recently had his tummy tuck surgery scheduled at Des Moines Plastic Surgery (I think it was there). I haven't talked to him since as I don't make it over there to work out these days as I go to Anytime Fitness in Urbandale. We talked about it a bit before he had the surgery. It was going to cost him $7,000 as insurance doesn't cover it in most cases. And that $7,000 has to be up front. I hope at some point to have a tummy tuck to get rid of the skin around my stomach and back. It's not terrible, but it's there.

I have abs under this skin and want to see them!
I'll have to follow up with Mike at some point and see how his surgery went!

Still working out 5 days a week....

I'm still working out 5 days a week at Anytime Fitness in Urbandale. I love it there. GREAT machines! Satellite TV to workout to.
I've been tanning, too. The girl I'm seeing didn't tell me that you need to start out slow when tanning; 5 minute sessions to start then build up. The first couple times I went I did 20 minute sessions and got burnt! It didn't hurt like a regular sunburn, but it did itch! I've now cut back to 10 minute sessions.

I REALLY notice a huge difference in my muscle mass. My arms are much more muscular than a year ago. My legs, too. I've noticed my flexibility is way better as well.

Lately I've been doing 30 minutes of cardio and 30 of weights. Some days I'll do cardio then just upper body and crunches then the next day I'll do cardio then just lower body and crunches. Some days I'll do all 3. Since tomorrow is my day off, I'll probably do all 3.

I'm now doing 310 pounds on the leg press and could probably do a bit more yet. Not much more and I'll be maxed out on the machine and will need to go to squats on the free weights.

I feel great!

Upcoming possible speaking engagement....

So Sonya Heitshusen emailed me today and said that Guide One Insurance wants me to speak to their employees sometime after the new year!
They're apparently going to be doing a 'Biggest Loser'-type thing and want me to kick it off by speaking to their employees about my weight loss successes. That'll be exciting. This will be the first group that I've spoken to where the people want to lose weight thru diet and exercise! I think they'll really enjoy my speech!
I told Sonya she could have them contact me. I can't wait to talk to them about it!

Riding a high from an awesome performance on Friday night....

So I was part of a theatre show last Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights at Rex Mathes auditorium in West Des Moines. It was a night of short plays all written by Greg Freier.

The play I was in is called 'I Love You Mrs. Claus' where I played an elf named Murray. Murray is lusting after Mrs. Claus, and right away you find out that he's gotten charged with sexual harassment previously for it. Well, I came up with a creepy character and elf voice to go along with it. Thursday night we had a small crowd. Friday was bigger, but not a big enough crowd. Friday, though, I was on fire. Unstoppable. I improvised some of the performance (not the lines, just some of my movements and whatnot). The moment I came out and spoke with my voice, the audience died. It was a nasally, elf-like voice. Think the elf from that classic Christmas TV show from the 60's or whatever...the one where the elf wanted to be a dentist...Herme was his name, I think. I kinda borrowed the inspiration for the voice from that. The second I started reading the script, that voice came out of me. Anyway, the audience died when they heard that voice paired with the awesome costume Karen made for me!
Anyway, I killed. Every little thing I did and said got a laugh. One laugh bigger than the last. The credit goes to Greg Freier for a hilarious script. He gives me the credit saying that what I did was better than what he wrote, but that's not possible. I just said the words he put on the paper. I put a little of my stank on it.
It felt really good. Our play was the last, which was nice because people came out of the theatre laughing and telling me how good I did. The girl I'm seeing was there. People from my old sketch group were there. It was awesome. A couple of the guys from my sketch group were saying how it was the best any of us ever did in any sketch we did. I think it's giving me too much credit, but then again I was on stage and they were in the audience, so I'll take some of the praise. :-) Greg Freier, the playwright, told me that my character was a creepy elf genius or something such.
God it felt great. I haven't had laughs like that in a long time. It made me long for the days of The Patsies when we were doing our stuff.
Greg has now written another short play with me in mind. He's already asked me to be on his team for the 711 Theatre Project for next summer! It's nice to be wanted and for people to have faith in you and to give you praise.
Sorry to toot my own horn, but beep beep! Sometimes it just feels good to ride the wave. I just wish more people had been there to see it.
We may do the show again, so stay tuned!

New shift at work....

So I'm 'temporarily' working a new shift at work. 3p-12a with Tuesdays/Wednesdays off. I put it in quotes because the boss that kept reiterating to me that it was only temporary has now been fired. I hope to God it's temporary because I need my evenings and weekends for theatre.
Today is the 2nd day of the shift. Instead of going to the gym in the morning, I woke up and ate 'breakfast' and watched Cops then went to the gym just before work with enough time to come home and shower.

Put an offer down on a condo....

So my great friend, Mary, let me know of a condo that she found online recently that matched what I'd been looking for. It's right in my price range and is around the square footage I'd been looking for. All in all, it's just what I'm looking for.
I made an offer on it the other day. Today we had the inspection, and it went off without a hitch! The furnace is 20 years newer than we thought. it's still old, but better than being 40 years old! The place has an AHS home warranty for a year, so that'll cover the furnace for a year.
The only things the inspector found were a leaky sink drain pipe that likely needs tightened and the kitchen has 2 outlets that need replaced with GFI outlets.
The sellers reduced the price by $15,000 recently as they're paying the mortgage on this place and the new place they bought. It has new windows as of 2007 and new paint and carpet as well.
Wish me luck!

Results from my body composition....

I had my body comp done yesterday and have the results.
My body comp back in October 2007 was somewhere in the high 40's. Yesterday it was down to 18.5%! WOW!
I should have the bloodwork back later this week! I don't expect to see a huge difference in those numbers because they did my first bloodwork after I had already lost quite a bit of weight and made big changes to my diet. There wasn't a lot of room for improvement already, but maybe there will be some.

Getting a body composition and blood work done Monday....

Mercy Hospital has been awesome enough to do a body composition and blood work for me on Monday morning! I have to fast for 12 hours which won't be a problem. I eat dinner around 6pm anyway and have a snack of almonds at 8:30 each night. Skipping the snack won't do me any harm.
I can't wait to see my numbers! Thanks Mercy!

Check out the video from the story Channel 13 did on me last night....

Here's the video of me from last night on channel 13 news! If it doesn't work, you may have a pop-up blocker blocking the windows from opening. Hold down the control key on your keyboard while clicking the link!

http://www.whotv.com/global/video/popup/pop_playerLaunch.asp?clipId1=3131186&at1=News&vt1=v&h1=Dave+Williams+Move+It+Follow+Up&d1=165533&redirUrl=www.whotv.com&activePane=info&LaunchPageAdTag=homepage&clipFormat=

Channel 13 update on me will air tonight (Wednesday 11/12/08)

The update on my weight loss progress will air tonight on the channel 13 news at 10pm.
Everyone keeps telling me that they're seeing the teasers all over channel 13. I haven't seen any yet. Can't wait to see it.
The girl that I'm seeing now will be watching. She'll have to endure the scary before pic.....eek.

Channel 13's update on me will be airing tomorrow night....

I received word yesterday that channel 13 will be airing their update on my weight loss story tomorrow night on the 10pm news!
Stay tuned!
My mom said she saw a promo commercial for it during the 6-6:30pm time slot yesterday.
I hope they mention me working at Anytime Fitness in Urbandale now! Sonya made sure to have me mention it on camera.

I got PAID for speaking....

I got a check in the mail the other day for speaking at Take Control
of Your Diabetes a couple of weeks ago!
I wasn't expecting any money, so it was a nice surprise. It was a
decent chunk of change, too!
Thanks TCOYD!

Sent from my iPhone

An update on my mood as of late....

I was going thru a rough patch for a while where I was questioning my identity in light of all the weight I lost. I didn't know who I was anymore, etc. My identity had been wrapped up in my weight for sooo long because I had always been overweight. Losing my weight would be like someone losing a limb: it changes who you are to a degree.

I was also in a sad, depressed mood for quite a while. I took a promotion at work that just wasn't right for me. I couldn't handle the stress. I'm high strung as it is, and that just sent me over the top. I had a sort of break down. I went to the doctor as well as a psychiatrist and a psychologist. I was diagnosed with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) as well as a general anxiety disorder and depression.
Years ago, I had been on Zoloft for depression. The psychiatrist put me on Zoloft again recently for depression and OCD as well as Clonazepam for my anxiety. It's been a world of difference. That and I'm back to my old position at work at my old desk. That helped tremendously with the anxiety.

I saw the psychologist a couple of times. We talked about some of the stuff. Mostly I talked and he was an impartial party to just listen to me. I think we all could use someone to just listen to us. I talked through the things and am working through them. I've come to realize that when it comes to fight or flight, I'm a flight person. When the going gets tough, I get going. There's not necessarily anything wrong with that. It's who I am. I need to work on that through small steps, to not always do that.

I think I'm learning who I am just by being me. This weight loss thing has become so much a part of my life that I'm making it a part of my personality, I think. By answering the ad for the job at Anytime Fitness, I opened myself up to something new. I didn't think that they'd want me training people with not being a certified trainer, but they saw in me what I know is in me: someone who can motivate other people to lose weight the way I did: through hard work.
Just like when I took that improv class a few years ago. I was shy, but funny. That improv class led to me auditioning for an improv troupe which led to me being cast in an improv troupe. That led to me being asked to join a sketch troupe. I also started doing plays. Then I started doing short films. It just snowballed. Door after door kept opening for me.
Maybe the same will happen with this fitness thing. Who knows? I've been doing speaking engagements. I got a job as a personal fitness consultant. What next? Who knows?

When we shot our film for the National Film Challenge a couple of weeks ago, my spirits couldn't have been higher throughout the whole weekend. In recent films, I was a drag. I was hard to be around. I was grumpy. I was difficult. I was whiny. Why? I have no idea. Maybe I was depressed. This film was completely different. I was happy. I wasn't complaining or whining or sulking. I was back to being me. I was happy and goofy and having a good time. That's me. That's who I am. Kimberly, my friend Andrew's girlfriend (and my friend) came to me when we were shooting the film and said that she was proud of me for going to the doctor and getting help. She noticed how much better of a mood I was in. Thank god for good friends who stick by your side and see you through those bad times until you come out on the other side. Thanks guys! :-)

I have a couple of 'dates' this weekend. Both people saw me when I was being myself and having a good time. Happy go lucky. In a good mood being me. People see that and want to be around people like that. I want to be around people like that and I want to be around me. I like me.
Thank god for those friends who stuck around me when I was in those bad moods. It was hard to do, I'm sure!

Oh yeah....check out our latest film 'Tempted' at www.arizonainkstudios.com!

Body image....

It's funny how we see ourselves.

Just last night I was training someone and mentioned my weight loss over the last year (120 pounds) and how my next goal is to lose another 15. The lady looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Are you sure? Can you lose another 15 pounds??" as though I didn't have that much weight on my body.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with where I am, but I could stand to lose a bit more eventually. I'm in no hurry, mind you, but I want to lose a bit more yet.

My family always makes comments like that, too. I'll mention that I wear a size medium dress shirt now and they say, "Do you really want to lose more weight? You'd be down to a small!" While I don't think losing another 15 pounds would put me in a small at 180 pounds, I do think that I could stand to lose 15 pounds. I do have a lot of muscle on me now. More than I've ever had even when I was in high school lifting pretty often.

I guess it's all in our body image....

My workouts continue at Anytime Fitness....

I keep working out at Anytime Fitness every morning Monday-Friday for an hour. I usually do 30 minutes of cardio and 30 minutes or so of weights. I love working out there. They have great machines and plenty of them!
I keep training others there as well. Every weeknight but Wednesday due to rehearsals. It's a lot of fun!

Side to side photo comparison of me from exactly a year ago....

So a friend of mine sent me a pic of she and I from last year at my Halloween birthday party side-by-side with a pic from this year of us. By that time last year I had already lost maybe 45 pounds or so. Look at the huge difference!

By the way, like my Amish costume this year? I won the costume contest! I was apparently making an Amish face in the photo....

Had my first personal training client yesterday....

I had my first client yesterday.
It went well except for right off the bat! I had the guy do the hip adductor and hip abductor machines. I couldn't figure it out and had to ask for help from my boss, Jess! I had never used it before and didn't see the handle on the side. The guy looked at me like 'This new guy is an idiot!'
He's quiet, but I think I built a good rapport with him and had him talking at the end. His abs got a good workout! I had him do the bosu ball 'machine' as well as the ab machine then I got him down on the floor and did various types of crunches with him.
We finished with some stretching which he said he hadn't done in ages. Flexibility is one of the biggest things everyone needs to work on!
Can't wait for Monday. I have 4 or 5 clients that night!

Worked out at Anytime Fitness this morning before work....

So I worked out at Anytime Fitness before work today. I love that place!
I did about 30 minutes on the treadmill jogging some of the time and walking some. The treadmill has a TV built into it! You simply plug your headphones in and the controls are right at your hand! Nice! Same thing with the ellypticals. And they're the same style ellyptical that I loved so much at Mercy: Life Fitness!
After the treadmill, I hit the weights and did a circuit of upper and lower body.
I'll probably work out there again tomorrow morning.

HyVee is out of super protein bars...

So I normally buy a box of Odwalla Super Protein bars about every 2
weeks (12 per box @ $12). They're cheap for a protein bar with 16g of
protein and 220 or so calories. A lot of super protein bars are way
more expensive.
I ended up buying some low carb protein bar with 20g of protein. Since
they're low carb and I eat them after my workout, I'm going to add an
apple to my post-workout snack. The bars I bought are 170 calories, so
the apple will get my calories up there as well. I think these bars
were $1.49ea so I just bought 2. I'm going to keep checking HyVee. The
HyVee by me @ 86th & Douglas doesn't carry them, so I have to keep
checking the Valley West HyVee.

Speaking of out of things...
The HyVee by me doesn't carry my natural peanut butter any longer.
That or they're out of it temporarily. The kind I buy is in a glass
jar & is good. Chunky, but not too chunky. The kind I had to buy this
time was in a plastic tub & the chunks of peanuts are literally half
peanuts -- big chunks.

Sent from my iPhone

Working out @ Anytime Fitness in Urbandale tomorrow...

I'm not working out at Mercy tomorrow. I start working at Anytime
Fitness in the Cobblestone Market in Urbandale Thursday evening. I
want to familiarize myself with the gym before then, so I figure
tomorrow morning will be a good chance to do so.
I'd have gone today, but I had to meet Brad Argo from Blue Gate Media
@ Mercy so he could shoot a couple quick bits for Mercy's website. He
needed a bit more filler.
I can't wait to start @ Anytime, but I'm a bit nervous...

Sent from my iPhone

My speech this last Saturday....

So I had my speech on Saturday afternoon. I had to leave our film shoot in the middle of it to go speak then go back to filming.
There were four speakers: A doctor who performs the lapband weight loss procdure, a dietitian from Mercy's Center for Weight Reduction, a patient who had the lapband done and whom also works at the hospital, and me.
There was 1 hour set aside for the 4 of us to speak. Well, the doctor spoke for 40 minutes. The dietitian spoke for 10. For you math majors out there, that left 10 minutes for me and the other speaker to do our thing. I ended up racing thru my speech in 5 minutes so that the other person could speak. It was a real bummer.
The doctor and I spoke beforehand. He said that he heard about me and what I'd accomplished. he said due to me he was going to change one part of his speech.... He got to the part where he said that DIET AND EXERCISE DOESN'T WORK. I couldn't believe my ears. He said that I was the exception. He said that people just can't lose weight and keep it off thru diet and exercise. Wow.
Sounded like he was trying to sell the lapband procedure pretty hard! Diet and exercise DOES work. You just have to commit to it.

Where did McDonald's Asian salad go?!

I went to McD's over lunch for a salad since I was way too busy over the weekend shooting the film for the National Film Challenge to go to the grocery store. I ordered the Asian grilled chicken salad and was told they no longer have it! Bummer! Fairly healthy except for the sodium from the dressing.
Oh well.

New photo of me from my birthday at work....

So here's an updated photo of me from my birthday yesterday at work for those who haven't seen my physical progression yet. Kinda hard to tell probably with the jacket on and all, but it gives you an idea....

A goal I want to work towards next....

I'd love to get certified as a personal trainer. I need to do some research on that to find out just what I need to do. I truly want to help people accomplish what I've done. I feel as a certified personal trainer I can better do that!

Today's workout....

So yesterday was my 31st birthday. I was out til midnight at Billy Joe's for some karaoke and a few drinks. I wake up at 5:40am to eat breakfast and get ready for the gym, so I was BEAT.
I should've slept in, but I'm dedicated!
Thursdays is body sculpting class. We use dumbbells for upper body and then do various crunches and ab exercises. Some of them we place the dumbbells on our chests for added resistance to really strengthen the abs and the core.
It was a great workout.
I am sooo sleepy, though!

Spending my birthday alone :-( ...

I'm spending my birthday alone tonight. :-( Boo! Kinda sucks.

Sent from my iPhone

Channel 13 shot an update on me today at the gym....

Channel 13 shot my update today to air in November sometime. Sonya made sure to have me mention that I work part time at Anytime Fitness now! :)
I can't wait for people to see me now that had seen me on the news then!
Stay tuned for an update when that'll be!

Speaking on Saturday at the Take Control of Your Diabetes event....

This weekend I'm speaking at the Take Control of Your Diabetes (TCOYD) event. It should be in front of at least a thousand people from the way it sounds. My name is in the brochures and everything. It's kinda cool!
I'll be speaking about natural weight loss and about my journey from 316 pounds to now (about 195 so far).
This is a big event that they take from state to state.
I'm having some business cards made up to hand out to people afterward if we talk. It'll have my contact info for my job at Anytime Fitness as a Personal Fitness Consultant. That way folks can get in touch with me so that I can help them do what I have done!

I'm a personal fitness consultant!....

Anytime Fitness called today and offered me a personal fitness consultant
position! I'll be working at the Urbandale location in the Cobblestone
Market. Waiting to see what happens with my hours at Geo and Anytime
Fitness is waiting to see what time their clients sign up for to see
when I'll be working. I'm very excited!

Sent from my iPhone

Part time job interview today....

So I saw an ad on Craigslist for an interesting part time job. I
answered the ad and had an interview today. What's the job, you ask??
A personal trainer at Anytime Fitness in Urbandale. The manager said
it's not necessary to be certified. She said what I've done in losing
the weight in the last year qualifies me. I would love to help people
achieve what I've achieved!
I should hear back Monday or Tuesday!

Sent from my iPhone

Shot video today for Mercy's website....

Mercy hired a film crew to shoot some video of me and my trainer, Deb,
to put up on their website as a success story.
John Cahill and Brad Argo who both used to work for WHO shot the video
this morning. They shot me working out and also interviewed Deb and I.
Sounds like the video should be done in a few weeks.

Sent from my iPhone

Weigh-in....

I no longer have my official weigh-ins at Mercy since I hit my goal of
losing 116 pounds. I weigh-in unofficially in the locker room. My new
goal is to lose 20 more pounds to get to 180. I didn't weigh-in last
week. I weighed myself today and now weigh 195! 15 pounds to go to get
to my current goal! That's a loss of about 2 1/2 pounds a week! That's
great this far along, especially for how long it took me to get to my
last goal!

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday night's speech....

I was invited to speak at the Rising Sun church on Wednesday. The time
slot was an hour and a half. I thought I'd only speak for 30 minutes.
I didn't have to fill the whole time.
I had a 1 page outline prepared with a focus on motivation. I ended up
speaking for 90 minutes! It was a great experience. I'm really
looking forward to speaking at TCOYD on 10/25!

Sent from my iPhone

3 weeks til my birthday....

Three weeks til my birthday as of Wednesday. I'll be 31. I hope my
family gives me money so I can buy clothes. I think having some nice
clothes will help me to feel better about myself. I'm wearing a 2X
shirt today since I can't afford clothes that fit. If I were to wear a
shirt that fit, it's be more like a medium shirt or a large at most.
It's hard because you know you'd look good in clothes that fit, but
that little thing called money is keeping you away from those clothes.
Now, if only my family read my blog! HA! Then again, my mom and dad
are the only ones that will get me anything, so I won't be able to buy
a lot (not complaining! Just thinking aloud).

Sent from my iPhone

Today's workout....

I hit the cross trainer today for 40 minutes. I upped the resistance
level from 12 to 15 for either 20 or 30 minutes (I forget). For the
remainder of the time, I slowly lowered the level.
I burned 550 calories in those 40 minutes! I ate maybe 350-400
calories or so before going to the gym. Not sure how many calories I
burned after that when I hit the weights then did ab exercises.
We upped the weight on a lot of the machines. I'll be upping the rest
of the machines next time. I'm now squatting more than I weigh. :-)

Sent from my iPhone

I did it!!!....

I weighed-in tonight before the show. I needed to lose 2 pounds to get
to my goal of losing 116 pounds in under a year.
I lost 2 1/2!!! I beat my goal! I weigh 199 1/2! I haven't weighed
under 200 pounds for the first time since probably junior high!
So awesome! I am so stoked!

I was at Kohls last night trying on some clothes. I wanted to buy some
but just couldn't afford it. It was pathetic. I ended up getting a t-
shirt that came with a long sleeve t-shirt. I tried on a few dress
shirts. I wear a MEDIUM now!!! CRAZY! I started out less than a year
ago in a XXXL shirt. WOW! I haven't worn a medium since before junior
high, I think.
It's crazy.
19 1/2 for my next goal!

Sent from my iPhone

Watching The Biggest Loser....

So I missed The Biggest Loser premier last week because I thought it
started this week. I was bummed last week when I learned of it.
As I watch it, it makes me realize how far I've come and what I've
gone thru to get here. I'm so lucky to have this opportunity to lose
this weight. These people have been given an amazing gift as well.
As I watch, it reminds me that I need to be working on my 2 speeches
for my upcoming speaking engagements. The speech I'm giving on October
8 is regarding motivation. It's so easy for me to STAY motivated right
now. The tough part, I remember, is getting motivated and STAYING
motivated in the beginning. I think that'll be a big focus of my
speech is how to motivate yourself to start making the change and how
to keep it going once you've begun.
The people in tonight's episode are dealing with the historically-low
week 2 numbers that everyone experiences on the show. Apparently the
average loss for week 2 of all the seasons is 2%. Meaning the average
percentage of their weight loss is 2%. The father/son team netted
zero. The dad lost 3 & the son gained 3. Those weeks of gaining are
HARD. I can only imagine how hard it is early on. I was lucky enough
to not gain anything until quite some time in, and that was TOUGH.
Trying to stay motivated when you see yourself gaining after working
so hard makes you question doing it. You feel like you've failed. As
long as you've worked hard, that's all that matters. You eventually
learn that your body does what it wants to do as far as weight loss.
All you can do is give it the necessary tools by working hard.
Where do I buy motivation? If I could just afford a trainer I wouldn't
have to worry about motivation. The answer is you can't buy
motivation. A trainer can't motivate you. A trainer can ENCOURAGE you,
but motivation must come from within. That's not to say trainers
aren't worth the money. I haven't paid my trainer (someone has) but
she's encouraged the hell out of me.
I think I have an unintentional start to my motivation speech....

Sent from my iPhone

Walk from Obesity....

This coming Saturday morning I've volunteered to help with the Walk from Obesity in Waukee. I'll be registering people for the walk. Some co-workers also volunteered. Should be fun.

Dear diary....

This is pretty much the only vessel (searching for a better word but
can't find it) I have to get my feelings and thoughts out.
I hate to continue to harp on my feelings as of late. They're so
negative and sad. I feel empty. I feel lost. I feel no sense of
belonging whatsoever. I feel there's no light burning from within. I
feel like a campfire left to burn out on its own after everyone left.
My fire has quit burning because there's nobody left to fuel it.
I get around groups of old friends now and feel no sense of belonging.
I don't engage anyone and nobody engages me. I don't feel a part of
anything anymore. I've been trying to put my best foot forward lately
and have been trying hard to be in a better mood around people. We
went out after the show tonite. When I got there, I was left to sit at
the end of the table by myself behind everyone else. It just seemed
like how I was feeling was playing out before me, physically. Joe &
Jolene showed up and sat near me. I tried engaging them a few times,
but they were busy talking and snuggling so I just sat there until I
finished my 1 beer. I couldn't afford that single beer, but I thought
I'd go anyway to try and feel a part of the cast. Instead, I was
placed on the sidelines to watch.
Maybe people just feel a vibe coming off of me...pharamones, maybe,
that tell them to stay away from me.
When I try to speak, I either get interrupted or nobody pays any
attention and I feel like an idiot.
On the occasional trip to Billy Joe's for karaoke, I sit alone. There
once was a time where I'd invite a friend or meet some people there
and we'd hang out. Now when I invite people either nobody responds or
they don't want to hang out. I'm left to be the loner sitting by
himself drinking a few beers and watching people have fun while I do
my thing. I've tried staying home & watching tv instead of going out,
but then I feel more lonely. At least there are others at the bar so I
feel less lonely by proxy.
What is there to do on a weekend alone? I honestly feel abandoned
these days. This isn't some plea for sympathy or something from those
few that read this. This is me just trying to get in touch with my
feelings. To actually see what it is that I'm feeling and to try and
work thru it. I'm not sure how to do that. I don't have the tools to
work thru what I'm feeling.
This isn't about being single. I prefer being single after my last few
relationships. I don't necessarily feel alone because I'm not in a
relationship. I feel alone because there's nobody around me. It's a
vicious cycle. One that I don't know how to break. I'm like a stray
dog taking a break from his journey to chase his tail because it's the
only thing to do other than continue along alone. Wow. Horrible analogy.
Why do people I once hung out with no longer want to be around me?
Have I changed or have they? Seemingly, I have. By sheer numbers, all
of those people can't have changed, so it must be me.
Maybe this is my fate. Maybe this is all for some reason I'm yet to
discover. When people say they're on a journey to find themselves,
what do they mean? How does one find themselves? I've no flashlight,
and it's so dark here in my room. The only light is coming from my
alarm clock which ticks away the number of minutes I'm alone. Like a
prisoner marking the number of days in their cell. The other light is
coming from my phone. The phone that doesn't ring anymore. I call out
only to hear nothing coming back but my own voice leaving a message on
someone's voicemail. I reach out and touch someone with a text message
waiting for them to send one back but I'm left staring at the light of
my phone listening to the cricket in the basement. It's kind of funny
when you think about it: like a comedian telling a joke and you hear
nothing but a cricket chirping. Just call me cricket.
How does one make new friends when the old ones don't want you around
anymore? Where do people go when they're alone?
I need mental stimulation outside of work. I don't really talk to
anyone anymore because there's nobody to talk to. Nobody that wants to
listen.
After the show Friday night I went downtown to spraychalk the streets
so people at the farmers market would see the advertisements as they
walked along. Me & BK decided to hit Dos Rios for a small bite to eat.
I talked to the cute waitress a bit. Left her my # on the check when I
left. She texted me today. I asked who it was and she told me. I asked
her some small talk questions but got very short replied of 1 or few
short words. Finally asked if she was single and the reply was 'Nope'.
Asked her what made her decide to text me and got no response. Why
would you text someone that you apparently don't want to talk to? Weird.
Time to quit counting the words and minutes and drift off to sleep
only to try and make tomorrow better and less socially-awkward.
"I'm a loner, Dottie, a rebel."

Sent from my iPhone

Strange observation as I drift off to sleep....

So just before bed I saw the blue veins in the back of my hands for
the first time ever. Being fat all my life, I had never seen them
before. Small thing, but big in an odd way. I looked at them for a
minute and poked at them.
I still don't recognize that guy in my mirror.
Yesterday I was moody. Today was better. The difference may have been
that yesterday I had some free time before rehearsal. I think maybe
when I have free time my mind starts thinking and for some reason goes
to the places I don't want it to. I'm really not sure. Maybe if I keep
it busy & preoccupied it keeps me from having a chance to get
frustrated, grumpy, moody, and lonely.
Anyway, today was good. I saw my veins. :-)

Sent from my iPhone

Today's workout....

Today in class we did our usual Thursday body-sculpting class with dumbbells. After weights, we did ab exercises.
Before class I knocked out an intense 5 minutes on the cross trainer. After class I did a 5 minute cool down walk.

Tomorrow the trainer from today will be doing a yoga class. Since my trainer is gone, she's taking over for the day. Should be fun. Yoga always leaves me sore.

Yesterday's workout....

Yesterday I decided to run since it had been a while. I ran about 20 minutes then walked for a couple and I think I ran 5 more or so (I forgot!) then did a cool-down walk for a few minutes.
After that, I hit the weights.

My post the other day about 'Who am I?'....

So the other day I posted a blog about being a bit depressed lately and not knowing who I am anymore. A friend sent me the following today, and I wanted to share it because it's great insight:

"Perhaps you are struggling with self image. The jolly fat man was both security and an accepted stereotype for you to fall into. Surely as you no longer have food as a comfort, some support has been kicked out of from under you. I think the psychological component of weight loss and change cannot be underestimated and I think it would not be a bad idea to investigate some sort of counseling -- just as you got help with changing yourself physically. Perhaps you really are undergoing a mood swing / chemical change? Yes, Virginia there is a Santa Claus and yes, Mr. Cruise there is post partum. This could be similar. Just a thought. I'm not suggesting Woody Allen's years of psychoanalysis (nor dating your "daughter") but definitely if you feel the urge to vote for McCain -- GET HELP. LOL"

When I worked for the Department of Corrections, I had a lot of problems, especially, toward the end, with management harassing me and whatnot. This depressed me and sent me in a downward spiral. I ended up going to Employee and Family Resources for some counseling. Mostly the lady just listened to me and how unhappy I was due to that job and management. It was very cathartic just getting it all out there.
It wouldn't hurt to do that all again. We as people have baggage. It's just a fact of life. I'm a believer that some level of counseling is beneficial for everybody. I should look into some as my friend suggested.

I really have lost sight of who I am. Having been overweight for so long, my perception of my self was so wrapped up in that image. I was the jolly fat guy. I had to be happy in order to get people to like me. I wouldn't allow myself to have bad days, I guess, or at least not to show it as much. I just feel a bit lost now, I think. I have changed an incredible amount physically and probably emotionally/mentally as well. I have to reevaluate, somehow, who I am now. It may not make sense to those of you who haven't undergone such a drastic change, but it's real. As great as I feel about losing weight and transforming my body, I feel as equally lost right now.
So much about me has changed. I used to go to the bar and knock back 3 pitchers (18 beers) of Boulevard Wheat and not even have a buzz. Now that I've lost 114 pounds, I drink 1 pitcher (6 beers) and I'm buzzing -- a couple more than that and I'm drunk.

I need to explore some resources. I bet there's some good books out there. Maybe if I find some free time, I'll look for some info online. Maybe there are even support groups for people that have lost large amounts of weight. Who knows.

What damn time does Walgreens open?!?!?!

Arg!
So this morning I did my routine which was eat breakfast and then hop in the shower before heading off to the gym. I know, I know, 'Why shower before the gym when you're going to get all sweaty, only to shower after you're done before heading off to work?'. It's just part of my routine. Anyway, I went to my gym bag for some deoderant, and it wasn't there. I decided to head to Walgreens on 22nd Street in West Des Moines near 235. I drove by there at about 6:30am and they were closed. Now I remember a while back that some of their stores changed their hours from 24 hours a day to less hours. I kept driving and figured I'd go to the Walgreens on University Ave in the Drake area. I figured that store would do great overnight business, especially w/ school in full effect, and figured they'd be open. And they weren't! Needless to say, I went to the gym sans deoderant. Hopefully nobody noticed! I couldn't smell me! I went to the grocery store after the gym (and after showering) to get some things, including deoderant, before heading to work. I was so irritated that Walgreens was closed at 6:30 and 6:50am! Arg!

Today's workout....

Today we had steap aerobics class. I didn't get to the gym in time to warm up beforehand, so I went straight to class. After class I did a 5 minute cool-down walk on the treadmill.

My trainer is gone this week.... Today's workout....

My trainer is gone this week....

My trainer, Deb, is gone this week. I think her husband is having surgery.
I'll be hitting the workouts solo this week (except for Tuesday and Thursday classes).



Today's workout....

I hit the cross trainer today for 30 minutes. I upped it from level 10 to level 12 today for the first time. After the cross trainer, I hit the weights as usual.

Last Thursday's weigh-in....

I weighed-in last Thursday and stayed at 202. Zero pound loss. Not disappointed at all. The way my body has been working, I may end up losing a decent amount this week. Seems I'll not lose anything or even gain a pound or two one week then the next week I'll lose 3 or 4.
Still 2 to go to get to my goal!

Who am I?....

I haven't been me for a while. It's hard to explain. I'm not sure why
I've not been me. I'm irritable. I isolate myself.
It's hard when you're so happy about some things, but other things
you're not happy about.
I'm used to being happy-go-lucky and funny, etc. I haven't felt like
that for a while. If you're reading this and we're friends, please
understand that it's not personal and, honestly, not something that's
easy to deal with. I'm going to work on it.... Sorry.

Sent from my iPhone

Today's workout....

I only had enough time to do like 2 minutes on the cross-trainer to warm up before class.
In class we did weights as Thursday is body-sculpting day. We did just a tiny bit of step to get our heart rates up a tad. Then we used our dumbbells for many different upper body workouts.
Good workout as usual!

Today's workout....

I haven't really run much since my 5K. Today I decided to do a bit of running.
I did a 2 minute warm-up walk then ran 5 minutes then walked 1 then ran 5 then walked 1 then ran 5 and walked 1 then ran 5 and walked a few.
After that, I hit the weights then did some abs.

Yesterday's workout....

I'm really enjoying the fact that even in Tuesday classes lately we're incorporating weights sometimes. That means some weeks I'm doing weights 5 days in a row.

Yesterday we did step aerobics then incorporated some upper-body with dumbbells. After that we hit the abs. I did a 10 minute warm-up on the cross-trainer and a 5 minute cool-down on the treadmill.

Saw some old pics of myself today....

I was watching a DVD today that had some stills of me from some short
films I did in the past. Man. I had forgotten just how huge I was. My
body is COMPLETELY different than it used to be. I just can't believe
how different I look! I look so much better now! I also saw some
recent pics of me on the same DVD and was amazed at how thin I look! I
haven't been this thin since junior high or before! There's no better
feeling than seeing how far you've come!

Sent from my iPhone

No workout today....

Since today is Labor Day, the gym is closed. No workout today.
I think Wednesday my trainer is doing my measurements. It'll be great
to see that progress!

Sent from my iPhone

Pics for brochure and promo video....

So Mercy wants me to go get my pics taken for their brochure. I'm putting it off until I can afford something decent to wear that actually FITS me!
They also are going to shoot a promo video for their website before too long. Hopefully it'll help motivate others!

Last night's weigh-in....

So last week I had gained 1 1/2 pounds.
I didn't go to the gym last Friday because I was out way too late Thursday night. I was worried that missing that day might have a negative impact on my weight loss. Well, I was wrong.

I lost 3 pounds this week! I'm now 2 pounds from my goal! I've now lost 114 pounds since the end of September of last year! I'm at 202!

I never would have thought a year ago that I'd have lost this much weight. I knew I'd do well, but never dreamed THAT much! I hear from people all the time how much of a difference they notice and how good I look.

Today's workout....

Today was body-sculpting class. Not only did we do weights, but we also used the exercise ball.
With the dumbbells, we did the usual upper-body workouts. It was nice, because we did some upper-body w/ bars at our Tuesday aerobics class. So this week I'll have done upper-body 5 days in a row.
We used the exercise ball for some resistance when we warmed up before we went to the weights. We then used the ball for ab exercises.
I didn't get to the gym in time to do much of a warm-up before class, so I just walked around the gym for 5 minutes or so. After class I walked on the treadmill for 5 to cool down.

We'll see what happens with the scale tonight. 5 to go as of last Thursday....

Last Thursday's weigh-in....

I gained 1 1/2 pounds last week. Hopefully I'll make up for that this week.
5 to go.

Too busy to blog....

I got a promotion at work and have been training for the last couple of weeks or so and am never at my computer, so I never have time to blog. I'm also stage managing a play, so I never have time to blog from my phone in the evenings. Still working out hard.

Today's crazy schedule; I got up at 3:40am for the gym....

I start my new job at ABC 5 today at 4pm. That means I have to leave my full time job at 3:50 or 3:55 (ABC 5 is a couple of blocks away from my FT job). I had to come in to my FT job 2 hours early so I could get off 2 hours early. That also means that I had to get up at about 3:40am to go to the gym.
If anybody questions my commitment, even after losing 112 1/2 pounds so far, I think waking up at 3:40am to get ready to go to the gym kind of shows how committed I am!
I didn't get to bed until 9 or 9:30pm.

Anyway, so I went to the gym then got to work a bit before 7. I work til 4 and start my job at ABC5 at 4. I work til 6 or 6:30. If they let me work the 10pm news, then I go back in at 9 or so and work til 11pm or so. If I don't work the 10pm news, then I'll go to play rehearsal at 8pm til 10 or 10:30. Blah.

Tuesday's workout....

Tuesday I did about a 3 minute warm-up on the treadmill. I then went to step-aerobics class. We also did abs. After class, I did a 5 minute cool-down or so.

Monday's workout....

Monday I ended up doing the recumbent bike for like 20 minutes or so then switched to the cross-trainer for like 20 minutes or so.
After that, I hit the weights as usual.

I did it!....

Wow.
I finished the 5K. My goal was simply to run the entire time & not
walk, and I met my goal! Not only did I meet my goal, but I finished
in the top 1/3 or 1/4!!!
I have to say, about 2 miles into the 3.1 miles, I wanted to stop
running and walk. The 3 people running with me encouraged me to keep
going.

The organizers accidentally messed up and put the finish line about
1/2 mile further than it should have been. I ended up running about
3.6 miles in about 30:30 (30 minutes, 30 seconds). I poured it on at
the end and sprinted the last little bit.

The people running with me (Chris, Sara, & Adam) were surprised by my
pace at the beginning. Chris said afterward that when he saw my
starting pace he about gave up and said he was going to slow down and
would meet us at the finish. They also noticed whenever anyone passed
me or came close I would speed up. I guess I kinda noticed that, too.
Psychological, probably.

I am SO proud of myself! A year ago you couldn't have paid me to run.
Today, I paid to run! Funny!
I kept up an awesome pace and did better than I had hoped for!!!

Oh yeah! I forgot to mention, I got my race shirt last nite. I ordered
a size large and it fit! Wow! A year ago I wore a XXXL shirt!!! I now
wear a large?!?! That's incredible!

Sent from my iPhone

Getting ready for 5K right now....

I'm standing here at Water Works right now getting ready to run.
Pretty excited, but a bit nervous!

Sent from my iPhone

Tomorrow is the big race!....

Tomorrow at 8am I'm running the 'Run for Your Life' 5K at Water Works Park.
I've gotta say, I'm a bit nervous. I've never done this before and don't know what to expect. Will the mosquitos be bugging me? Is it going to be one of those humid, foggy mornings which will make it hard to breathe? Am I going to be able to run the whole time?

My number one thing for tomorrow is to run the whole time. I don't want to end up walking at all if I can help it. If need be, I will, obviously. I want to run the whole time.

My trainer, Deb, will be there to watch and cheer me on. My co-worker, Sara, will be there to run with me. She's going to follow my pace. My friend Annie's husband, Chris, may be running with us as well.

Stay tuned for an update....!

Today's workout....

I got to the gym and talked to my trainer a bit before class, so I didn't have time to warm up before class.
In class we did exercises on the exercise balls. We also did a bunch of ab exercises in between stuff.
After that, I hit the weights as usual.

Tonight's weigh-in....

So I'm coming off of a 1/2 pound gain last week.
This week I lost 2 pounds! I have 3 1/2 to go! I've lost 112 1/2!
Not bad!

Sent from my iPhone

Today's workout....

Did about a 3 minute jog today before I had to get to class.
In class we did the body bars and resistance bands. The bars are just steel bars of varying weights. I use the biggest (18lbs). We just did various lifting and such for body sculpting.
We then did abs.
After the weights, I did about a 5 minute cool down walk.

Today's workout....

So today my trainer was gone. I walked into the gym and Abby was at the desk. For a second I wondered if it was Thursday.
When I saw Abby was there, I went back to my car and got my iPhone so I could listen to my headphones while I jogged. Deb likes to talk to me while I jog. Sometimes it's easier for me to focus on what I'm doing if I can listen to music, because it's hard carrying on a conversation when jogging.
I did a 2 minute warm-up walk then jogged for 30 minutes straight then did a 5 minute cool-down walk. That was the first straight 30 minute run I've done in the gym for a while. It was really quite easy today and almost relaxing listening to music while running.
After the run, I hit the weights and did the usual routine. We've upped most of the machines as of late. I can really notice a big difference in my muscle tone lately.

New position at work....

I was offered a new position at work a couple of days ago. I accepted it today. It's more responsibility and might lead to more stress, but it's what I need to do to move ahead. If I can lose 100+ pounds, I can do this.

Today's workout....

Only had time for about a 3 minute warm-up jog before class today.
In class we did step aerobics then abs and stretching.
After class I did about a 5 minute cool down walk.

Good things happening....

So I had an interview at Border's Book Store on Friday for a part time job. They offered me the job right then.
I had applied online with ABC 5 for a part time camera operator position last week and got a call today for an interview on Friday at 4pm. I asked for Friday because I'm getting my hair cut at lunch Friday! Hopefully my boss will let me off a bit early to run over for the interview and come back when I'm done. I'm excited about the opportunity. She asked if I have experience. I told her just shooting local theatre for archival purposes and such and she said that it didn't matter anyway because they'd train me.
My boss is also offering me a promotion, essentially.

Keep your fingers crossed....

Frisbee golf yesterday....

I went and played some frisbee golf yesterday with some friends. We went to Ankeny on First Street, right before you cross under the interstate.
The park was under water quite a bit back in the spring. I guess it's got like 27 holes or something. We had to cross over a dam in the creek at one point to get to some of the holes. The water was shin-deep over the dam, so our shoes were soaked. We ended up quitting a bit earlier due to that. It's a fun game, though. :)

My first outdoor jog yesterday....

So I decided to go for a run outside yesterday to help prepare myself for the Run for Your Life 5K this weekend.
I was thinking of doing it then not then thought about it again. I got bored Saturday night and decided to go to Billy Joe's for some karaoke and beer. It was dead and I was bored there, so I only stayed 2 hours for 4 beers. I went home and drank a bunch of water to rehydrate before bed so I could run in the morning.
I went out about 8:30 or 9am Sunday since the 5K will be at 8am or so. I don't think I ate enough for breakfast before I went running. I was running out of energy. I had just 3 whole grain crackers w/ a tablespoon of peanut butter on each and a glass of skim milk. For Saturday, I'm going to eat my supper for breakfast to ensure that I have the fuel. I kept petering out needing to walk. I didn't do terribly bad, but not what I had hoped for. Plus, it's really hard to run alone and to not be able to judge your pace at all. On the treadmill, my pace stays at 6.5mph the whole time. I have no idea what I was running on Sunday. I think I started too fast, too.

I have at least one person running with me. My co-worker Sara, who runs a lot, is running with me. She's going to let me set the pace. That will help me a lot, I think. My friend Annie's husband, Chris, may be running with us as well. My trainer might be there to cheer me on. Channel 13 may film it to update my progress. Wish me well! :)

Last Thursday's weigh-in....

I gained 1/2 pound last week. I'm not too concerned like I was those 3 weeks when I was going back and forth between losing and gaining 1/2 pound. I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing and let my body decide when it wants to let go of the weight. After those 3 weeks of back and forth then suddenly dropping 4 1/2, I realize it's up to my body as long as I keep doing what I'm doing.
5 1/2 to go!
Down 110 1/2!
At 205 1/2!

Busy, busy, busy....

So I'm stage managing a play for Theater for a Change. I'm also looking for a part time job right now for extra income.
The stage managing thing takes up 4 nights a week or so. I want to work about another 20 hours a week at a part time job, but I don't want to take up big chunks of my weekend if I can help it. I might cut the stage managing back by a night to 3 nights a week or so.
I have an interview Friday morning at Borders Book Store down the street from where I work. I like that place. Seems pretty chill. I know someone whom works there, so I have an in there.
We'll see....

No workout today....

I didn't work out today because I had to attend the deposition of a physician's assistant who treated me a couple of years ago. I won't go into detail about the case here and now, but we have the hearing Friday afternoon. I will be working out Friday morning.
I can tell I didn't work out. I don't feel as good. I don't feel bad, by any means, just not as good as when I do work out.

Today's workout....

So today I did a brief warmup before class. I jogged for about three minutes before it was time to go to class.
In class, we did step aerobics. We had a couple of new people which is always nice. We rarely have new people come in for some reason. It's a great class. After doing step, we did some yoga exercises.
After class, I jogged for 5 minutes.

Played frisbee on Saturday....

So I tagged along to a barbecue w/ a couple of friends of mine Saturday night. I didn't eat too bad. I had like 3 ribs, some baked beans, pasta salad, and some sort of cauliflower hybrid or something. I also had a strawberry cobbler smoked over apple wood and cherry wood served over ice cream. DELICIOUS. Oh yeah, and 2 kringle (pronounced kring-gluh) -- yummy Norwegian pastry/cookie. I like the way my grandma makes hers better than the ones I had there.

My friends and I played frisbee. Just regular frisbee, tossing it back and forth. When you're chasing it, it's a great workout. And fun. I've always loved freestyle frisbee. Nothing better!

Today's workout....

Did a 2 minute warm-up walk this morning on the treadmill before running.
I upped my speed today to 7mph the whole time I ran.
I did 7 minutes then walked 1 then ran 6 and walked 1 then ran 5 and walked 1 then ran 4 and walked 1 then ran 3 and walked 5 or so.
I went over 3.5 miles and burned over 400 calories.
I gotta say, I really didn't notice any difference in running 7mph compared to 6.5mph previously. I wanted to up my speed to prepare for the 5K on August 16. This way, even if I run slower outdoors, hopefully I'll still be at a decent clip.

After running, I hit the weights. We've upped nearly every machine by a level or two recently. I figured they'd be tougher to do, but some of them seemed so easy that I had to ask my trainer if she accidentally set them to a lower level but she hadn't.
After the weights, we hit the ab exercises using the exercise balls.

My cab ride home with a VERY smart South African....

I wasn't drunk, but I don't chance it when I've been drinking. I hang
out at Billy Joe's for karaoke. They have a sober ride which is a free
cab ride which takes you home.
I take it often because I'm afraid to drive even after a couple of
beers. I've had cab drivers high on Meth. I've had cab drivers whom
are hippies. I've had cab drivers who don't speak a word to me.
Tonight I rode with a scholar. I got in and heard an accent that
sounded British. The cab driver looked maybe Indian. I later asked
where he was from and it turns out he came here in 2000 or 2001 to
chase the fake American dream.
We started out with small talk. He asked me how my night was and we
immediately turned to the smoking ban and how it's hurting businesses
and how it's against what this country was founded upon. I referenced
the Boston Tea Party, not sure if he'd know what I was talking about.
He certainly knew. He picked up my train of thought and ran with it.
We discussed politics and how the two party system is a ruse. It's a
sham. We discussed how this country is not an actual democracy and far
from it. We discussed imigration and how this country was founded upon
imigration yet we're trying to make imigrants evil these days. We
talked about how corporations control this country and the elections
and the presidency and the parties and the entire country. And they DO!
We sat in my driveway for 10 minutes and discussed this. He made a
comment that as a foreigner he has no business discussing this. He has
EVERY business discussing it because he's what this country is based
on. My people came here from Norway. I'm from America, but my
ancestors came here for a better life in the early 1900's. He came
here in 2000 or 2001 for a better life. YOUR ancestors came here from
their land of origin. Nobody reading this damn blog is 100% Native
American and if you were, you'd be just as mad and impassioned.
The corporations want you and I to be poor. They have power over the
poor. I don't know about you, but my dollar doesn't buy what it used
to. That's why suddenly I have to get a part time job in order to LIVE!
If this cab driver were a woman, I'd have proposed on the spot. This
30-something man knows more about this country and its history than
most people of my generation. And he's more patriotic, too. He loves
this country for what it was. For what it's supposed to be. For what
it was founded on.
We both agree that this country needs a revolution. People of my
generation need to stand up. We need to take this country back and
return it to the country that our forefathers gave us. A peaceful
democracy that cared about the freedom of its people. This man from
South Africa knows more about this country than most of our generation
and cares about this country more than most Americans of this
generation.
When are we going to wake up? When are going to realize this isn't
America, but instead a company known as America, Inc.???
Somebody back me up here. I know you're all smart. I know you can see
the forest for the trees. I know we're not the only ones that feel
this way.
We need to band together and begin to take our country back.
Wow. I just blogged for 30+ minutes on my iPhone. I want to say so
much more. McCain is Obama. Obama is McCain. Don't buy into the BS
that is the system designed to keep you in check. Designed to keep you
poor.

How are we going to organize? How are we going to rise up? It starts
with a smoking ban. It's a slippery slope. What right is next?! Wake up.

PLEASE SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS EVEN IF YOU DISAGREE!!!

Sent from my iPhone

Won something on Mancow today....

So I listen to 105.1 from Ames. In the morning, Mancow is on. I tune into that as I drive to the gym. They were discussing that there may be a new Ghostbusters movie sometime. They threw out a trivia question: "Who were the original 4 Ghostbusters?"
I figured why not call and try to win? I knew the answer and figured I could multi-task while driving.
I called in and got thru on my first attempt. The call screener asked for my answer. I gave it to him:
Dan Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Harold Raimis, and Ernie Hudson.
He put me on hold until they got to that portion of the show. After 15 or 20 minutes, they got to that portion. When you're on hold, you can hear the show over the phone. I heard everyone calling in giving the wrong answers. I knew they'd be getting to me soon with the correct answer. Then it happened. Some OTHER dude gave the correct answers! I couldn't believe it. I thought, "Gosh. Do I hang up or wait on the line?" Glad I waited. The phone screener came back on and apologized profusely. It turns out that when the guy called, he gave the screener the wrong answers then probably looked up the correct answers and when it was his turn changed the answers. The screener said that he hung up on the guy and he wasn't getting the prize. He took down my info and they're going to mail it out to me. Not sure what I'm winning, but it's just cool to win. The screener couldn't have been a nicer guy! :)

Today's workout....

In class we worked out on the exercise balls. Did some aerobics-type stuff on them.

From there, I did the weights as usual. I'm really building up a lot of muscle.

Updated measurements....

So below I have charted out my measurements since the end of October....

I've lost 35 inches in 9 months! WOW.

Tonight's weigh-in results....

If you'll remember, over the last 3 weigh-ins I lost 1/2, gained 1/2,
then lost 1/2 again. I was really frustrated. I had no idea what
tonight's weigh-in would bring.
I lost 4.5 pounds! YES! I'm down to 205! I have 5 to go now to get
to my goal!!! I don't even know the last week I lost more than 4
pounds! Wow!
The only real change I made this week was I didn't work out Monday
since I took the day off from work due to the 48 Hr Film Project and
had to meet with my lawyer. I have to meet with my lawyer next
Wednesday, so we'll see what that does.
I'm really excited.
With 11 weeks or so until my birthday and my speech at Take Control Of
Your Diabetes, I could conceivably get to my next goal of 180!
Man. I am proud!

Sent from my iPhone

Comments that frustrate you....

So I weigh-in at Mercy Center for Weight Reduction on Thursday nights right after work.
The manager of the clinic says some things that frustrate me at times. I'm sure she means well, but words can be misinterpreted...

I hate it when she says: "Do you really think you're going to be able to keep the weight off?"
My answer: "Well, I've only gained a little bit just a few times. I've been losing steadily for the most part for some 10 months or so."

She also says: "Do you really think you're going to keep working out 5 days a week? Is this something that you can keep doing?"
My answer: "I love working out. I love going to the gym 5 days a week. I started out at 3 days a week and loved it so much that I decided to go 5 days a week."

I'm sure she's not trying to second-guess me and that maybe she's just trying to get me to think, but I don't like questions like that which have an underlying negative slant.

I AM going to keep the weight off. I AM going to keep working out. I've found what works for me and what I enjoy. If I need to make adjustments later, I will. Whatever I can do to keep healthy and keep on the right track I'm going to do!

I don't hear any of that stuff from anybody else. I think everyone sees my pride and sees my drive and devotion and motivation and understands that this is for real. This is for life.

Look at my melon now next to my melon before....

Before (316lbs)




Now (209 1/2 or so)




Of course it was sunny and I was squinting while looking into the sun....

Today's workout....

So today I jogged for 7 minutes then walked 1 then jogged for 7 again then walked 1. I then jogged 6 then walked 1 and jogged 6 then walked 1. Then jogged 5 then walked 1 then jogged 5 then walked 1. Then I jogged 3 then walked for a few minutes for a cool-down. Oh yeah, did like a 1 or 2 minute warm-up walk.
After that I did the weights. We upped most of the machines today or will Friday. After the weights, we did the abs.

Friday we're going to do measurements....

Thoughts before bed....

As I lay here in bed having just watched the ABC special about Randy
Pausch (sp?) and his 'The Last Lecture', I'm thinking a bit. The more
time I spend alone (and it's a lot anymore) the more I wonder why I'm
alone.
I'm selfish. I put myself before others a lot of the time. Am I a nice
guy? I think so. Usually. I try to be. Does being selfish make me a
bad person? Sometimes I wonder. I've done some bad things - very bad
things - due to selfishness.
I'm egotistical. I love the attention that I get from people talking
about my weight loss. I crave that attention. I crave attention in
general. My ego has been a big part of my losing weight, though.
I believe in karma. I put myself first so much that it's no wonder
that I'm single. It's no wonder that I have just a few friends. I'm
not even sure how those friends can stand to be around me sometimes. I
spend so much time alone, I think, because people don't find me fun to
be around a lot of times. Karma has me by the cohones these days.
I used to say all the time how I'd never get married because my
parents' marriage was so bad. The older I get, the more I'm kind of
second-guessing that. Did they have a bad marriage? Ooh yeah.
Sometimes I feel my biological clock is ticking. Most days I wish I
had someone close to me to share my recent successes with and to talk
about my other recent frustrations with. Sometimes I don't want to be
selfish. Sometimes I want to put others first and not myself.
It's funny that as much weight as I've lost, this is the longest I've
been single in quite some time. As good as I feel about myself
physically some days, I must be putting out a negative vibe.
Back to karma: You get back what you put out. I've put out a lot of
bad, though I really am well-intentioned and don't mean to hurt
people. Sometimes I don't know how to get past myself and my feelings
for the good of others.

Sorry.

In the past, this would probably be a burger and fries and huge pop
and then ice cream later. Today it's words and thoughts and feelings.
And ego. And selfishness. And loneliness. And karma.
Until I change my output, I'll keep getting the same input.
Here's to trying to make a change.

Goodnight.

Sent from my iPhone

Today's workout....

I hit the treadmill before class today. I did a 1 minute warmup walk
then jogged for 10 then 1 minute cool-down.
In class we did step aerobics. We did a bunch of combinations and
drills. We also did abs. For some reason I was light-headed and dizzy
during class.
After class I jogged another 5 minutes and did another 2 or so minute
cool-down.
Good workout.

I'm trying to post this via email from my iPhone, so we'll see if it
works....

Sent from my iPhone

Lunch for lunch and learn tomorrow....

So I don't have the food or money to bring my own lunch to the lunch and learn tomorrow. They're getting Jimmy Johns. I had signed up for no food during the last one because I intended to bring my own. Since I'm broke and foodless until tomorrow, I went online and looked at Jimmy Johns menu. I decided to get a Turkey Tom sub minus the bread (lettuce wrap) and substituted the may w/ avocado spread (probably not much better, but oh well). I also ordered it w/ all veggies. I'm going to bring some edamame to eat with it.

Another upcoming speaking engagement....

So one of the organizers of the 'Take Control of Your Diabetes' event that I'm speaking at in October emailed me today to ask permission to put my name on the pamphlet for the event.
After letting her know that was fine, I let her know that any time they'd like me to speak, I'm open to do so.
She emailed me later and told me that she's the wellness coordinator for her church and said that once a month or once every other month they'd like to have someone come speak about wellness. She asked me to come speak in the fall about motivation! Of course I agreed!

I really enjoy sharing my story and paying Mercy back for all that they've done for me and to pay it forward to others by sharing my story and helping people to achieve what I've achieved in whatever small way I can.
Hopefully these engagements will lead to other engagements! :)

Shoulder problems....

So lately my right shoulder has been giving me some minor problems. Three weeks ago or so we were playing Walleyball in the racquet ball court and I did something to hurt my shoulder. It was a bit sore for a couple of days then seemed fine. Then when doing the chest press and shoulder press, the outside of the shoulder hurt. It was fine doing the lat pull down, tricep press, rowing, etc. The past few nights when sleeping I'd wake up in the middle of the night with a sore shoulder. If I slept with my right arm up above my head, it would tend to hurt. It doesn't hurt during the day at all except for when doing the shoulder or chest presses at the gym. I mean it's not that bad when lifting. We're talking on a scale of 1-10 w/ 10 being the worst, it's only at a 3 or so. But it's enough to make me notice. I'm only going to lessen the weight if it gets noticeably worse.

Last night's weigh-in....

I am soooo frustrated. So like 2 weeks ago I lost 1/2 pound. Last week I gained a 1/2 pound. This week I lost 1/2 pound. Earlier in the week I had been doing well. I had lost a few pounds and as the week went on, the weight came back up.
I've been eating the same foods as always. This last week I switched breakfast and supper around since I work out in the morning and my supper is a bigger meal. I needed the more calories in the morning before working out.
I just can't figure out why every weekend when I don't work out, I lose weight then as the week goes on, I gain it back while working out every day. WHY??

209.5.

This weekend will be super-busy....

So this weekend is the 48 Hour Film Project. That equals busy.

What that exactly means is the following:
Friday night I'll leave work and head to the Art Center where my team and I will draw a film genre. We'll also be given a character, prop, and line of dialogue.
We'll then have 48 hours to write, film, edit, and submit a 7-10 minute film.

It's busy, but it's a blast. This is my 3rd or 4th year doing this...I forget. It gets hectic and sometimes stressful, but a blast nonetheless.
Check out our previous films from the 48 and others at www.arizonainkstudios.com.

Hopefully I'll continue to eat right over the weekend!

Weigh-in tonight....

I'll be weighing-in right after work tonight.
I checked the scale today after working out at the gym and it seems like I was up a bit from yesterday. Oh well. That's why I need to quit looking at the scale on days other than Thursday night!
Stay tuned for results tomorrow....

Today's workout....

Today I did about 10 minutes on the cross-trainer before class.

In class we used the body bars and resistance bands. Body bars are big weighted bars. The ones we have go up to 18 pounds. I used the 18 pounder. The resistance bands are color-coded. I decided to push it hard today, so found out the blue bands are toughest so I used it. But not for long. WOW. Very tough. I used it for one or two things then swithced up to the red band which is one down from the blue, I guess. Much better. Still plenty of resistance, but doable.

We then did some ab exercises.

After that, I switched up to the treadmill for a 5 minute or so cool-down walk.

Great workout, Abby! You jerk! (I'm storming off...) Inside joke....

Am I really going to run a 5K in August???....

So I was working out w/ my trainer this morning and someone who works at the hospital brought in some pamphlets for my trainer to put out. I asked her what they were and she said that they were pamphlets for Iowa Heart Foundation's 'Run For Your Life'. It turns out it's for a 3K run, 5K run, or a walk. I had been thinking about doing a 5K for a little while now since I've been jogging. I think it'd be a great idea.
A 5K = about 3.1 miles. I ran 3.4 miles today at the gym in 30 minutes. Granted I haven't run outdoors yet. Even though it's August 16th (humid, hot time in Iowa) it starts at 8am, so I think it's doable! It'd be nice and early before it gets hot.
I was telling a co-worker about it. She's really fit and runs a lot. She wants to run it with me! I think it'd be cool to have someone to run with for my first run.
It costs $25 (donation), but you get a t-shirt and a gift bag. You can do it for free, but don't get a gift bag or t-shirt.
It'll be at Water Works park, August 16th at 8am if anybody wants to join!

www.iowaheartfoundation.org or www.aedaccessforall.org/runforyourlife

God. Who knew a year ago that I'd be running without someone chasing me?!
I think I'm gonna do it!

Eating supper for breakfast seems to be paying off already!....

So I've been eating my supper for breakfast and breakfast for supper since last Friday. My weight loss had slowed a bit over the last couple of weeks and I figured I needed to eat more early in the day and less later in the day since I was much more active in the early part of the day.
Last Thursday I weighed 210. My trainer weighed me Monday as part of my fitness profile and I weighed 206.8. I weighed myself this morning after working out, and I was at 204.8 or so. I hope that tomorrow shows the same positive (actually negative since it's a loss!) results. I really think that eating the larger meal early is what's making the difference for me.
We'll see....!

Today's workout....

I got to the gym this morning, but the two good treadmills (the newer ones w/ cup holders and fans) were being used. My trainer had me just do the cross-trainer. I knew the people would be done soon as they're normally done by 7am or before. I got there around 6:45. Sure enough, after I did 2 minutes on the cross trainer they were done.
I moved to the treadmill and did a 2 minute warm-up walk. I then proceeded to jog 30 minutes. I wanted to do 35, but 30 was enough today! Man.
I did about a 5 minute cool-down on the treadmill then went to the weights. Even with upping the weights by a level on many of the machines lately, I'm doing more reps than before and in a few cases as many as when I did less weight. I'm really impressing myself with the weights lately. I can really see the difference. My muscles are becoming really defined. My arms, especially, are really showing the results big time. It's nice to see everything coming together!

Today's workout....

So before class today I did a 2 minute warm-up walk then jogged for 10 minutes then cooled down with a 2 minute walk.
Normally in Tuesday's class, we just do step (I don't mean 'JUST' as in it's not a good workout, because it's a great workout). Today we did a bit of step to warm up. We then did like 1 minute drills w/ our steps going as fast as we could. For instance, we would jog up then down up then down up then down onto our steps for a minute then pick up our dumbbells and do some weight training stuff. We'd then switch to another drill going as fast as we could then another weight thing. Man. Kicked my ass. I love Tuesday/Thursday classes with Abby, because I know they're going to be great workouts!
After class I did about a 4 minute cool-down walk.

This one lady in our class says to me today, "Trying a new hairstyle today?" I looked at her and said, "Huh??" and she repeated herself. I said, "Um, no. My hair has been like this for years now." Anybody who knows me knows my hair is pretty much always like this.
Who knows. Heh.

Bought a new evening snack....

So I've been eating 18 almonds for an evening snack for a while now. I like them, but they just don't quite seem to be enough.
I went to Dahl's in Johnston on Sunday because I needed to buy some protein bars for my morning snack anyway. I looked at the protein shakes as an option for an evening snack. One of the shakes was like $15 for a 4 pack. They were 300 calories and like 23 grams of protein. Those would be more of a meal replacement than a snack. I found another kind that were maybe $5-$8 for 4 of them (I forget just how much). They were only like 110 calories, but still high in protein (I think in the low 20's). I bout them to try them out. They came in aluminum cans just like pop cans. I bought Belgian Chocolate flavor. I had one last night, and it was bad. I choked it down. I'll finish the other 3, but think I'll look at other snack options.
I do like the idea of a protein shake as a snack because you can't sneak an extra drink the way you can sneak an extra few almonds. We'll see....

Today's workout....

After my fitness profile, I hit the cross-trainer for 34 minutes. I was at around 7 1/2 mph the whole time (give or take) on a resistance level of 10. My heart rate stayed really low the whole time.
From there I hit the weights. I'd increased the levels on many machines within the last couple of times I did the weights. Despite having increased the weight on the machines, I really excelled today. I hit my best number of reps on a lot of the machines today. The rowing machine I petered-out after 10 reps as we had just done another upper-body right before it (lat, I think). Normally we alternate between upper and lower, but some older guy was sitting on the leg curl machine for a long time (just sitting) and we couldn't do it.

It's crazy, no matter how hard I work out, I'm never really sore. The only exception is when we do yoga, and I'm still not THAT sore after.

Fitness test today....

So as part of Mercy Wellness Center's initiative or program or whatever, they did fitness profiles on participants in May (8 weeks ago). Today, my trainer did another fitness profile to see how I'd progressed:

On May 7:
Body Fat: 18.3% That was at the top of the 'Fair' level.
Bicep Strength: 103lbs Middle of the 'Fit' level.
Back Flexibility: 36cm Top of the 'Unfit' level.
Systolic Blood Pressure: 122 Top of the 'Fit' level.
Diastolic Blood Pressure: 63 Top of the 'Excellent' level.
Resting Heart Rate: 64bpm Middle of the 'Excellent' level.
Aerobic Fitness: The bike wasn't working (and still isn't working) so it brings the Total Fitness Score down as it still figures it in.
Total Fitness Score: 57 Top of the 'Fair' level.


Today 7/21/2008:
Body fat: 16.1% Middle of the 'Fit' level!
Bicep Strength: 101lbs Though down 2 pounds, one of the times we did it was 103 today.
Back Flexibility: 40cm Increased 4cm and went from 'Unfit' to the middle of the 'Fair' level.
Systolic Blood Pressure: 142 For some reason, this went up 20 points. We're going to check it again on Wednesday, because it doesn't seem right at all. Dropped me to the top of the 'Unfit' level from the top of the 'Fit' level.
Diastolic Blood Pressure: 67 Still at the top of the 'Excellent' level.
Resting Heart Rate: 54bpm Top of the 'Excellent' category. My trainer says it can't get much better than that. She said that anything below 70 is really good. She said 54 is like a really fit athlete.
Aerobic Fitness: Still not working
Total Fitness Score: 64 Since the bike still isn't working for the 'Aerobic Fitness', I'm sure that my score would be higher overall because that will take it way down. But, it puts me in the low-middle range of the 'Fit' level. I can't help but think I'in the upper-fit or possibly low-excellent level.


I'm ecstatic at the results. It really couldn't have gone much better in 8 weeks. There's still room for improvement, and with jogging now, I'm sure we'll see improvement the next time we do one (assuming they'll do one when I become a member).

Last night's weigh-in....

I weighed-in last night. :(
I gained 1/2 pound.
I lost 1/2 last week, so that evened out to zip.
I've been working out hard and even upped my calories a bit because everyone thought I needed more calories, and I probably did.
This week I'm going to try to eat supper for breakfast, lunch for lunch, and breakfast for supper. My logic is that I'm much more active in the early part of the day and more sedentary at night. I think this will help. I started it this morning. It was a bit tough to eat broccoli, cauliflower and lentils for breakfast! LOL. I might try to find a breakfast food that's around the same calories and nutritional levels as that meal.

I was a bit disappointed with the results of the weigh-in, but I can't get too down due to the results I've had over the last several months.

Lunch and Learn meeting at work on Wednesday....

So Wednesday we had a 'Lunch & Learn' at work. It was a meeting, basically, and work provided lunch. I figured they'd have pizza or something, so I brought my lunch with me to work. Glad I did, because sure enough, they had pizza. I ended up bringing my lunch into the training and eating it.
While I was on my in there, another co-worker who had just finished the session before mine, was giving me a hard time about bringing my lunch. He was saying, "They have vegeterian pizza in there. That's healthy. You can eat that." I told him that it's not just the meat that makes it not a great choice, it's everything on it. And I preferred to just eat my lunch since I brought it.

Anyway, glad I made a good choice.

Why my trainer was gone Wednesday....

I heard today why my trainer was gone Wednesday. Apparently she has knee problems and got a shot in it and she couldn't walk. That sucks. Hopefully she'll be back tomorrow! **Sending good vibes**

Weighing-in tonight....

I hope that I've lost more this last week than I did the previous week when I lost 1/2 pound. We'll see. I've been working out just as hard as ever, if not harder. We'll see....

New protein bars....

So the HyVee that I go to by my house at 86th & Douglas doesn't have protein bars in their healthfood aisles. I had recently been getting Odwalla Super Protein bars from the HyVee by where I work, but the other day they didn't have any of the Super Protein ones, just the regular ones with a little protein.
I ended up buying some of the South Beach Living bars. Wow. 15 grams of protein! That's a lot! 21 carbs, I think, and like 180 calories. It's a bit less calories than the Odwalla bars and I don't like the taste as much, but they do the trick. Great for after a workout. I got the peanut butter and chocolate flavor.

Today's workout....

Today was body sculpting day in class. We do cardio with dumbbells.
The biggest rubber-coated dumbbells we have are 10lbs. We have bigger regular dumbbells wuth the weights, but they're not rubber-coated and shouldn't be used in the gym on the wood floor.
Anyway, I lately I've been working up to the 10's from the 8lb weights. I always grab a set of both for when the 10's get to be a bit much. Today I didn't end up needing my 8's at all! It got close, but I made it. I pushed myself thru it.
At the end of class, we did some lower-body work and some ab work.

Before class, I hit the cross-trainer for 12 minutes. I upped the resistance to level 10. Normally I do level 4 or 5. Recently I upped it to level 8. Today I figured why not push it more?
After class I hit the treadmill for 5 minutes or so.

I won something at the gym today....

So there's been this fitness thing going on at the gym (duh, imagine that. shutup, smarta$$).

But really, there's been an initiative to get people at the gym more active in coming to the gym and working out more. Basically they do a fitness profile at the beginning of the thing and at the end. With that being said, part of it is that there's a weekly drawing. You have to come to the gym at least 3 days a week to be eligible.
Today a couple of people came up to me and told me they saw that I won this week (week 8, the final week). I was excited. I looked at the board and see I won a $25 gift certificate to HyVee! Heck yeah! And I think that puts me in the running for a grand prize (not sure what that is).

TMI = Too Much Information....

So here's a little entry I'd like to call "TMI".

So apparently it's not a good idea to wear cotton fabrics when working out. I had started jogging fairly recently, as you'll remember. Some days my trainer would want me to do the cross trainer then jog but I couldn't due to chafing from my shirt. OUCH. Rubbed my chest raw. It'd be fine until I'd start sweating and the shirt would stick.
Anyway, I finally bought a polyester workout shirt yesterday that's made to wick away moisture. Apparently it's a common problem. So common, in fact, that a shirt needed to be invented to rectify the problem. And did it ever!
I did the cross trainer this morning for 23 minutes going between 8 and 9 mph the whole time. Then I switched up and jogged for 7 minutes at 6.5 mph then walked for another 7 or so at a very steep incline. And no chafing! Normally I'm SOAKED when I'm done working out because I work out HARD. I push myself pretty hard. I was pretty dry. The shirt did great.
Sports Authority and Scheel's sell Under Armour brand and other nice brands of this style of shirt for $20-$35. I bought a Champion from Target for like $12. Very comfortable. I bought an XL cuz I like things loose when I workout, but a L would've fit fine.

Today's workout....

So today I hit the treadmill.
I warmed up with a 2 minute walk. I ran 7 minutes then walked 1 then ran 7 more then walked 1 or 2. I then ran for 5 minutes then walked 1 or 2 then ran 5 more then walked 1 or 2 then ran 3 and walked 1 or 2 then another 3 followed by a few minute cool-down walk. I ended up at 4 miles in around 40 minutes or so.
After that I hit the weights and the abs.

Last night's weigh-in....

So I weighed-in last night.
Lost 1/2 pound. A bit disappointing, but not the end of the world.

I didn't work out today. I was hoping the funds from selling my iPhone on eBay would be in my bank account this morning and I was planning on buying the new iPhone today, but no such luck. I missed out on the workout for nothing. Oh well....

Employee commentary when buying turkey at the grocery store....

So fairly recently I was at the grocery store buying deli turkey from the deli meat counter. Actually, a couple of different stories here....
It seems like 1/2 the time I buy deli turkey at the store, somebody has to comment, "Gee. You just bought turkey the other day." I'll reply with something to the effect of, "Yep, I sure did. Now I need some more, please." They'll either reply with, "Is that all you eat?" or "Don't you get sick of that?" Keep in mind that most of the clerks know about the weightloss thing on Channel 13. And it's not like I'm buying a pound of it every day; I might go thru a pound a week or so, depending how thin or thick it's sliced.

So recently I was there and another similar incident happened. This time, though, it was some clerk I'd never seen before. I pointed to the cheapest turkey and asked for a pound of it. She says, "I don't know how you can eat that. That stuff is just like water." I said, "Well, it's helped me lose about 100 pounds since the end of September, so it's not too bad." She replies with, "Well, I don't need to lose weight. I have a good personality." I just wanted to say, "I'm glad you're comfortable with being overweight. I wasn't and decided to do something about it. I also have a good personality. But my other personality wants some f$#(&!@^ turkey!!!"

Seriously. I'm very friendly. I talk to the clerks and always treat them with respect. I don't mind the first ones I mentioned. They're just noticing me and that's fine. But that one girl irritated me.
Did she think I was saying she needs to lose weight? Anybody have any thoughts?

Bought a new pair of shorts to work out in....

So I just finished a DVD project on the side and had a few extra dollars. I finally bought a pair of shorts to work out in that fit me. Size LARGE! Wow. I haven't worn a large since probably junior high! Crazy.
My view of my body is still off. I still see myself as bigger than I am.

Today's workout....

My trainer was off today because her husband had a doctor appt in Iowa City.
I jogged today. I did a 2 minute warm-up walk then jogged for 2 mins then walked for a min then jogged for 3 and walked 1 then jogged for and walked 1, so on until I jogged for 7 minutes then walked a 5 minute cool-down. I went a total of 39 minutes, I think, between walking and jogging. Almost 3.75 miles. Over 400 calories.
After jogging, I did the usual weights. I raised a couple of them by a level.

An article about some guy who lost like 100-some pounds....

So my friend Mary sent me the link to this article: http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/diet.fitness/05/30/weightloss.muata.kamdibe/index.html#cnnSTCText?iref
It's about a college professor who lost 100-some pounds in like 5 years. Reading that makes me realize that makes me realize that I've accomplished a lot. It took that guy 5 years to do it and it's taken me less than a year! We both weighed about the same when we started. One whole year he only lost 5 pounds. He did Atkins a lot, though. I'm a HUGE believer in NO FAD DIETS. Any 'diet' where you leave out an entire food group is not only unsustainable, but also unhealthy. You need to eat a well-balanced nutritious diet.
Anyway, read that for some inspiration!

Looking for ways to motivate others and pay back....

So I've been given a LOT by Mercy and Channel 13. From the membership, to the trainer, to the doctors and nutritionist and whatnot. I'm looking for a way to payback or even pay it forward.
I try to help people that want to be helped. If somebody expresses interest in my weightloss, I'll tell them about it. If someone asks how they can do it, I try to help them with that. I want to do more. I want to find a way that I can really help people out with their journeys. I feel I have a lot to offer thru my experiences. I know what it takes to lose weight and become fit and I can help others realize that as well.
I sort of think that speaking at the speaking engagements for Mercy is paying back some even if it's just a small thing. And frankly, I'm getting a lot out of it. I'd love to speak to groups as much as I can.

Thoughts?

Today's workout....

So I was running a bit late this morning. I had to take photos of my iPhone so I could put it up on eBay today. I got to the gym just in time for class.
Today we had aerobics class followed by some abs. We had no aerobics class last week because they were fixing the gym floor, so it seems like ages since I had it! It was great to get back into the swing of things.

Abby, the girl that does our Tuesday/Thursday classes asked me this morning if I had some before pics. I showed her the shirtless pic Channel 13 showed on the news as well as the pics from my blog a few pages back. She was wowed at how far I've come.

My trainer is off tomorrow, so I'm back at it alone tomorrow. I have a plan. She wants me to run in intervals like I did Monday, only this time reversed. Meaning she wants me to run the small amounts first and build up this time whereas Monday we started high and went low.

Today's workout....

Back at it today since the gym was closed Friday for the holiday. My trainer was back from vacation and was very pleased to learn of my 3 pound weightloss last week.

I only got about 5 hours of sleep last night due to my roommate accidentally ringing the doorbell on his way into the house at 2am. He then talked on his cell phone for a while in his room (we share a wall and I could hear every word). I tossed and turned for another 3 hours or so, but never fell asleep. But to my credit, I went to the gym anyway. It totally is a lifestyle change for me. Even from when I started working out a few months ago, I'd have used it as an excuse to not work out. I NEED the workouts now.

I warmed up w/ a 2 minute walk. Then I jogged 7 minutes then walked 1 then jogged 6 and walked 1, then jogged 5 and walked 1, then jogged 4 and walked 1, then jogged 3 and walked 1, then 2 and walked 1. After that, I think I walked another 5 or so minutes to cool down. All said and done, I jogged about 27 minutes and walked about 11 or so. Good workout.
From there, I hit the weights and abs as usual.

My trainer will be gone on Wednesday and I may not be there Friday when she gets back as I might spend the morning in line buying the new iPhone if I sell mine on eBay first. :)

4th of July weekend....

So I went to the Hampton/Sheffield/Clear Lake area for the holiday weekend. I was there Friday night into Saturday afternoon.

I ate a Power Bar for a morning snack before leaving (woke up a bit too late for breakfast). We stopped at the gas station when we first left; I got bottled water and pistachios for a snack -- good choices. We had burgers, chips, potato salad and the like for lunch Friday. We went to a carnival in Clear Lake. They had the usual carnival/fair foods, which I'm VERY proud to say I had NONE of! Go me! For dinner, we ended up eating at an Italian place. We all ended up splitting a couple of pizzas. I had 3 pieces and a beer. I probably should've just had 2, but oh well.
Saturday we woke up pretty late and didn't have breakfast. We stopped at a greasy spoon in Sheffield. It was one of those small town restaurants where everyone knows everyone. I got pork ribs, green beans, a roll, baked potato, and a salad bar. Of course they had no vinaigrette or light dressing -- oh well, gotta live once in a while. I had water to drink. Not super unhealthy, but there wasn't too much healthy stuff to pick from.
On the way home, I grabbed a Power Bar for my afternoon snack.

I got back to my normal meal plan when I got home.
I went to a movie Saturday night with a friend. She had a pop. I was good and had nothing (the ticket was like $9! ouch!). By the way, Hancock is a pretty good flick. Not your average superhero movie, that's for sure. Wasn't my favorite movie, but entertaining. It had something for the guys and something for the ladies.

I checked the scale when I got to the gym today, and it seems I stayed where I left off. I was pleased as I had made some choices that weren't the best food-wise.

Last night's weigh-in....

So due to the holiday, weigh-in was move to last night.
As you remember from my last blog entry, I made some changes this week to see if there'd be a difference. I was pretty confident there would be, but it was still a bit up in the air.
I lost 3 pounds! I'm down to 210! I haven't weighed this little since probably my 7th or 8th grade years of school.
I can't tell you how proud I am of all the hard work I've put in. It just goes to show that all you need to do is work hard and eat well and it will pay off.
The lady that weighed me in last night is different from the one who normally does. She saw the 3 pounds and was happy for me then she started flipping thru my chart and said, "Wait. It's not even been a year yet? You've lost 106 pounds in 9 months?! Then the gal that works at the counter in the waiting area told her that I did it all without doing Optifast and that I did it just by eating right and exercising. She was flabbergasted. :)
10 pounds left to go to get to my goal weight!